5 of 101: June 10th 2017 at Tea Trails
For me, Rohini is the sort of woman you want to understand, but you never really do. Because the more layers you go through, the more mysterious she gets. And she was a mystery I wanted to unravel to a point where my curiosity was never completely satisfied.
I knew a movie date with a woman who always had my attention, be it the way she dressed, the way she wrote, or the way she performed her pieces on stage, was going to be one of my best dates. It’s hard not to be impressed by Rohini. But the impression can be good or bad, depending on how well you can stomach sarcasm and brutal honesty. At a personal level, I have always been drawn to, as well as over whelmed by, this feminine strength and energy which oozes out of Rohini.
This date was also a self-sponsored one. For the date, Rohini and I planned to watch Wonder Woman. Another friend of mine had wanted to watch Wonder Woman before this movie date had been planned. Me being me, I saw no harm in taking this friend along, and so I booked 3 tickets. But boy, was I in for a surprise when I told them both about this plan!
Rohini was annoyed that there was a third person at the date. And my friend was shocked that she was intruding on my date and she did not come as she got late. This was, you might say, a paradigm shift for me. 101 Q Dates Project or not, the people who come on a date with me would have certain expectations from me and the date. I realized I needed to give my complete attention and time to the person I am on a date with. And I am glad I decided to do that. One of the reasons why I liked the movie so much was because of Rohini – she enjoyed the movie as much as I did, and we connected over why we both liked it so much. Rohini wanted to watch the entire a credits after the movie. so we sat in the theater hand in hand, with a very few others like us who wanted to watch the credits till the very end of the credit roll. I loved the movie so much that I even created a FB post on why I liked the movie.
After the movie, we roamed around the Bangalore streets and a mall trying to get to know each other a little more than we already did. At the ended of the date, I dropped Rohini home. She invited me inside to say Hi to her parents, but I decided it was not time to meet the parents just yet, so I politely declined.
As I decided to bid adieu, Rohini kissed me goodbye right in front of her house. There was no hesitation about neighbours or worries about what people who see us would think. And it’s Devil-may-care attitude that I love about Rohini.
Rohini’s Experience and Version of the Date
It is silly to ask someone why they go on a date with Dolly. Dolly has a bright smile, brilliant eyes, a very strong body and large and giving heart. What’s not to love, what’s not to date?
I’m really interested in the 101QDates project. There is SO MUCH visibility for straight dates. SO much. It’s not so much visibility as neon bright advertising. Our generation of queer people are building this sort of visibility for ourselves. We’re having to hunt up our ancestors who protested, who built communities, who lived and loved, and learnt o celebrate them the way straight people get to celebrate every single generation that preceded them.
So a project with at least a hundred queer dates, all different, ll documented and blogged – this is something cool and amazing. We need to see queer people dating, not dating, hanging out, being friends, getting married, being single, transitioning, performing, writing, filming, watching, reading, going to bed and the toilet. Living our big queer lives you know? It’s really important.
Plus like I said, it’s Dolly. I said YES as soon as she asked, and I made sure she asked me. 😉
We went to see Wonder Woman. I’d already seen it with some of our other friends, who hated it roundly. I liked it – I mean I’ll admit it has problems, but I liked it! So it was nice to see it again with Dolly, who liked it like I did. We both sighed over Gal Gadot’s beautiful beautifulness, theorised over which of the Amazonian women were queer (all of them. ALL of them ok?) and just enjoyed the shit out of the movie.
Did I tell you Dolly is generous? Dolly will be THERE for you if you need help. She puts her money where her mouth is. She knew I needed to travel to Cunningham road to pick my wallet, and she took me there to help me pick it up. It’s not exactly the most fun thing to do. MWUAH, Dolly. (We found my wallet. HOORAY!)
After which we just hung around and talked about things. Dolly and I have very different approaches to love and relationships – I’d say she is more romantic, more hopeful, more monogamous and a lot more committed than I am. And like I said earlier, she has this massive, open heart. I have a massive horror of romance or softness, which is not a compliment to me really. 😛
I don’t remember everything we talked about! Some of my dating history. The men who kept sneaking glances at us while we leaned against each other and brandished the roses Dolly had bought for me and chatted away. (Those men were on dates themselves. Keep your eyes to yourself dude! Would you like it if we stared like zoo-visitors at you?) WE discussed an old friend whom we haven’t seen in a while. Dolly is a great person to argue with since she spends time THINKING about what you say.
Then she dropped me home. I put my roses in a vase. They still look pretty good.